Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Quarter Life Crisis

I'm having a quarter life crisis. Ok, probably not a real crisis by any means of the imagination. And I'm sure many of you will tell me that what I'm feeling is perfectly normal for any 25 year old. But really. What am I doing?  I'm 25 and I feel like I've accomplished a lot over the last 5-7 years (of which I am VERY VERY thankful), but I can't help but feeling like I really don't know what to do next. College. Check. Husband. Check. Grad School. Check. House. Check. Successful (mostly) career. Check. My 5 year plan (out of undergrad) is complete. Now what? What's the next plan?

I feel a little stuck. Most of my stuckness is related to my job. I've worked really hard to get where I am, but really don't LOVE what I do. Some days, it can be pretty fun so maybe I'm just in a rut. I switched jobs about 6 months ago from a job and team I'd had for over 4 years. I like my new job and the new challenge but I'm still not there yet. So what do I do? My job affords me a comfortable life with amazing health insurance. We want to have babies, I can't just give up free health care? What about when we do have kids? What then? Keep working? Stay home? Don't get me wrong, I think raising kids and being the rock-star Mom is probably one of the most important things I will do. But I didn't go to business school for 5 years (2 years for my undergraduate and 3 years for my grad) for nothing. I don't want to feel like all the work I've put in over the last 7 years have been for nothing.

I dream of a job (and a job for my husband while were at it) where we can afford (and have the time) to travel. A lot. I'm fascinated by traveling and the experiences and perspectives gained from it. How do I get there? We've been dutiful little savers and have been blessed by both having good jobs. We could not be more grateful. But what do we do with that? I refuse to believe that two weeks of vacation a year will suffice my never ending travel bug. And honestly, I have a bit of a hard time even at the thought of not having a stable job and a stable income (preferably for both of us).

I want to do something that means something. That has an impact. That makes a difference. On my good days, I DO feel like what I do in my job has value. My company makes airplanes. Airplanes connect people from all over the world. More than that, I have the ability every day to impact the lives of the people I work with. Even if my project is stupid or people are stupid or my job is stupid. I CAN make a difference.

So maybe I just need an attitude adjustment. It's very possible. Life is possible and I want to get out there and LIVE as much of that life as possible.

**all images are from cards I bought while traveling.

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